Yes I am one of those wives that constantly calls her husband’s name to come to the rescue …
Mark, there’s a spider.
Mark, my duck eggs are gone.
Mark, I think I cut my finger trying to cut an onion.
Mark, I heard a noise.
Mark, I had a bad dream.
Mark, there’s a snake in the yard. Oh it’s a worm.
And he gets up every time to come to my rescue. Even when the spider is just a piece of fuzz.
And last night…
Mark, oh dear gosh my nose is bleeding. Oh never mind it’s a butterfly on the paper towel I just used.
And today when he gets home from work…
Mark, I think I have a fever.
Yes people with germs … I think you got me sick. Now my husband will have to suffer because I’m not good at being sick. I can’t just blow my nose and go about my business bouncing around looking all cute with a little red nose. No people, I look like the kind of chick my husband will think, what in the hell have I married. And good god woman, did you just spit a hocker like a man? (I’m sorry if you’re eating. But eww it’s the truth. Yuck.)
I am a HORRIBLE patient. I can’t take medicine like normal people because it has the opposite affect on me. May cause drowsiness…oh for the love of being hyper. Except my hyper means just laying there staring at a tv because my body doesn’t want to move. I have a terrible immune system. I’ve had pneumonia twice. I was always sick when I was younger. When I’m sick I’m dead to the world in la la land and if I had flannel sheets on the bed, I could care less if I spark a bed fire. I’ve been to the emergency room for dehydration when I do nothing but drink. Orange juice, hot tea, chicken broth…all day long. And I end up dehydrated.
I hate getting sick because I know what it will do to my body. And what it does to my poor knight in shining armor.
I have washed my hands, sprayed lysol, wiped down the grocery cart and it has failed me. I won’t tell you what I said to the lady that coughed in my face at the store the other day buying cough drops.
Ok I will…
“Excuse me, did you just cough in my face without covering your mouth? I would excuse it if you were … oh … say… FIVE. WTF.”
Yes I was a ^&$^&. Because I know what happens.
MARKKKKK … I’ve been calling you for the last 10 minutes. Maybe I need a bell?
Oh Mark, I feel for you. I really do. I wouldn’t want to take care of me either.
Have a good day all … you may see me on the 10 o’clock news.
News at 10 – Crazy chick in store spraying people down with lysol.
“Oh Mark” … it will never end.
Image credit: rachel_titiriga
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
My goodness I hope you get well quick !
I just got done taking care of Heidi for the last week because she had the flu and the whole time I was hoping I didn’t catch it.
Being sick is no fun at all and I hope you get better soon.
People are dropping like flies around here.. Colds, Flu, H1N1 flu.. and the winter has barely begun. Take care of yourself…
Bravo to you for ripping the coughing lady a new one. If I were watching, I would’ve piled on. Lord, I hate idiots.
Sincerely hope you hang tough and fight off the temptation to be down and out, your too much fun to have you away for too long!
I bet it was that cough drop lady that made you sick. You know you’re getting old when you start laying the blame on perfect strangers instead of bizillions of virus germs floating around in the air and everywhere else. Sorry to hear you’re laid up and this being hunting season and stick pizza and cupcakes that you won’t be able to taste for a week, now.
Get well soon Jody! Sorry to hear you are sick…
Get better quick Jody and I feel sorry for Mark too.
However… I don’t feel sorry for the idiot who coughed in your face or for the one who just “had” to see the baby and coughed in his face… guess who is sick now… AAARRRGGG some people should have “I’m an idiot” stamped on their foreheads
There’s still space in my hospital room if you need it. I’ve been here a week now, so I’m ready to be about done with it.
Sorry to hear you’re feeling ill and I hope it clears up soon. Try to avoid going to the hospital if you can. I don’t recommend it.
Well I hope you get better, Jody. It sounds like Mark is going to have his hands full for the next few days.
Thankfully I didn’t catch a cold. Seems it was allergies.
Kristine, goodness! Hope you are released soon.