This is continued from last weeks Riding In Others Cars With Scratch Off Tickets.
After my out of control scratch off addiction, I never told a soul and I banned myself from purchasing any more tickets. Until my sister…
It was during the holidays that my sister was over with a few scratch off tickets that just came out, The Jetson’s. My sister had a few for herself and gave me a couple to scratch off. Her very explicit instructions were you needed to get 4 of the same Jetson’s characters to win $10,000.00.
Her and I scratched our tickets with no winners. I was on my final ticket and I had 3 Judys and needed one more to win $10,000.00. My sister and my husband sat and watched as I scratched off the 4th and final square. It was Judy. I had 4 Judys. I had $10,000.00.
My sister jumped up screaming. My husband gave me the look of, I think we should buy a new boat. I sat there quietly, then jumped up with my sister happily screaming. We high fived, screamed, jumped up and down, danced and I even think she did a hurkie lurkie. This had finally paid off. I was a winner. I won $10,000.00.
My sister and I decided we should go to the gas station to verify my winning, buy more tickets and find out what to do next while my husband called family members to share our news. I quickly put my ticket in a zip-loc baggie so it wouldn’t get damaged and we were off.
We entered the gas station my sister purchased the tickets from and explained I had a winner. A very big winner and showed him my card in the baggie. He put his hand out and said, “I see.” I didn’t understand him and looked to my sister to translate. She said, “Give him the ticket.” She’s a regular there.
Oh no no no, he is not about to touch my ticket. He might run off with it or smear it. He again said, “I see ticket.” So I said, “Here you can see from here.” As I proudly held up my winning card. He put his hand out further for me to hand it over and that’s when I made it perfectly clear, ”You are not touching my ticket.” I didn’t mean to be rude but did he not hear me? He isn’t touching my ticket.
Our gas station friend took a closer look and began explaining, “You no winner. You play wrong. You scratch wrong squares. You ‘pose to scratch top numbers only not whole card. You not win.”
WHAT!!! “You not win!” I heard it over and over, “You not win!” “You no win!” “You suck!” “You not win!” “You addicted!” “You Loser!” “YOU NO WIN!” My sister grabbed the baggie holding card, looked at it and started laughing hysterically. I grabbed it back, flipped it over to read the instructions and stormed out of the gas station. I was no winner. I no win. I was a loser.
Rewind story to beginning: My sister prances over to my house giving me free scratch off tickets and tells me what to do and how to win.
Fast forward after I no win: We head back to the house and tell my husband to call relatives and explain I no win. My sister digs through the garbage to find the rest of the tickets to verify winnings with correct instructions. Sister ends up winning some money from a ticket covered in wet coffee grinds.
Fast forward months later after I’ve forgot about I no win: Sister and husband are at my house visiting when sister makes fun of me with “You No Win”. And what do I do, I added fuel to the fire. I confessed. I No Win twice and almost stole a car. I confessed.
I was car theifing loser.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
You no win!
I’m glad I’ve never been one to pay scratch offs. I think I’ve saved myself a lot of disappointment:)
I will never forget that day….it was hysterical….
That is funny Jody! Life is never dull at your house.
Hubby and I go through periods of buying scratch tickets. I haven’t won anything greater than $40. After we lose it postpones our drive for more…for a while.
So funny, yet so kinda sad…. lol
You see its more productive out there shooting scorpians, water skippers and grasshoppers with your bb gun. Holler when you run out of bb’s.
That is Funny, and the older you get the more mistakes you make and the siblings never let you forget a one.
Never have been much interested in scratch off lottery tickets, and I’m now thinking that’s a good thing.
Great story.
Great story. I’ll think of you everytime I scratch a new ticket. I’ll be sure to read the instructions first too.
I’m really not addicted I just have bad luck!
I have a feeling that this is not going to be the end of this story. Funny, funny post!!